“Married” Season 1 Episode 1 “Pilot” aired on Thursday, July 17, 2014, at 10:00 p.m. on FX. Lina (Judy Greer) and Russ (Nat Faxon), married for several years, were in a sexual slump. If only her husband could get the gratification he needed. So Lina suggested that maybe he could be with someone else. Was she serious? Did Russ take the suggestion? Find out what happened to the episode in the recap below.
The pilot opened with the couple in bed. Lina was reading one of her favorite vampire novels, while Russ was trying to get her in the mood, except that it wasn’t working with Lina. In the morning, the couple did their usual routine with their three daughters. One of them reminded her dad to feed the fish later, while she was in school. Russ did as requested and then headed out to meet a friend.
Complaining about his almost non-existent sex life, Russ’ friend suggested that he does something that her wife would be totally into and use this to get her in bed. That night, Russ dressed up as a vampire from a 1960s film, with the accent to boot. It was hilarious! Suffice to say, Lina did not find this sexy.
This brought up some real problems though, so Lina talked to Russ about her lack of interest. Between taking care of the kids and doing errands, she just wasn’t up for it. But she also didn’t want them to split up. Maybe he could get satisfaction from somewhere? Unclear about what his wife suggested, Russ turned to his friends. One of them said that maybe Lina meant he could get a mistress. But she also suggested that he should get his ear hair removed first, ‘cause that would be a total turn off.
Still unsure about what he’s supposed to do, Russ did heed the friend’s advice and went to get his ear hair waxed. The girl who had been working on him was pretty chatty and started talking about her troubled relationship and miscarriage. As she was talking, Russ thought… maybe she could be his mistress? In an attempt to woo her and in taking advantage of her vulnerability, Russ bought her a puppy, which she named Charlie, after her dead son.
Thinking he was actually going somewhere with Isis (Karolin Luna) from the waxing place, he brought her to her house, and she invited him to her bedroom. Just as they were getting it on, Russ got a call from Lina who asked where he was and if he could please come home immediately. They were going to have a funeral for Norman, the fish. Russ overfed him, and now one of their daughters was upset, so they were going to give Norman a good send off.
Russ made an excuse and told Isis that he would leave to buy dog food and toys. Back at his house, Lina told Russ that she knew he borrowed $400 from a friend and demanded what this was for. Russ didn’t want to tell his wife that he used this to buy a puppy for a woman he was hoping to have sex with. Lina said that whatever it was, she hoped that Russ would be discreet and not ask their friends for “whore money.”
Still unsure about everything, Russ returned to Isis’ house to actually bring dog food and toys, as he promised. But he also came back because he wanted to tell her that nothing was going to happen between them. This mistress bit was already stressing him out and confusing him so much.
When he got to her house, Isis’ boyfriend — a big, bald and scary guy — told him that she was at the hospital with her grandmother, who just had a heart attack. The boyfriend also gave Charlie the dog to Russ to temporarily care for it, while Isis was attending to her grandmother. But when Russ’ kids saw the puppy at home, he knew Charlie was theirs forever.
In the meantime, Isis was sending Russ sexy photos of her from the hospital. She also kept asking about Charlie.
Russ went to the hospital to break the news to Isis. He lied to her about Charlie getting ran over by a car. She broke down and cried because she was losing “Charlie” all over again. She said she never wanted to see Russ because it will only remind her of Charlie (the dog and her son). And this was how Russ was able to break off from his “mistress” for good. He went home to his wife and family and did the usual stuff. Guess he will have to deal with his sexual frustration in some other ways, huh?
So that’s it for the first episode of “Married,” which aired on Thursday, July 17, 2014, at 10:00 p.m. on FX. What do you think? Would you be watching more of it?
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